Thursday, 5 November 2015

No robo-licensees

I've just read in What's Brewing that pub licensees are highly unlikely to be replaced by robots in the foreseeable future. Researchers at Oxford University found that there was a 0.4% chance of automated licensees, largely because of the social interaction and cultural knowledge required.

I also expect the robots were unable to inject sufficient sarcasm into phrases such as:
  • No one else has complained.
  • Haven't you got homes to go to?
  • It's meant to be like that.
  • This is a pub, not a nightclub.
  • No, we don't have WiFi - we talk to each other.
  • We opened by that clock and we're closing by it.

7 comments:

  1. You new blog header is dead good Nev

    ReplyDelete
  2. I await the invention of RoboPunter

    "THAT'S-MORE-THAN-A-THIRD-INCH-OF-HEAD"

    "DO-YOU-HAVE-FOSTERS/PERONI/DOOM BAR?"

    "ARE-CHILDREN-ALLOWED-IN-HERE?"

    "IT'S-CHEAPER-AT-WETHERSPOONS-YOU-KNOW"

    ReplyDelete
  3. If the robot is made properly, the following, which my barmaid mother used to say, will no longer apply: "I've only got one pair of hands!". There is no reason why a robot should not be able to serve two people at once!

    ReplyDelete
  4. In the future all pubs will be vending machine only. Paid for with a card that verifies age and limits your weekly and daily unit intake. The only beer will be cans of Carling.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thanks everyone for your suggestions of pub banter - all good. Thanks Stonch, I'm glad you like this header; I like to ring the changes, as you've probably noticed.

    I really do hope you're wrong, CL!

    ReplyDelete

Comments, including disagreements, are welcome.
Abuse and spam are not and will be deleted straight away.